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Setting priorities A.K.A. Big Rocks

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blog setting prioritiesOne of the most important questions I continually hear parents ask is “How can I manage all the demands of my time, now that my family is growing and life is overly complex? There never seems to be time to fit everything in, and by the end of the week, tempers flare and everyone is just worn out”.  The following story was first published in a book titled First Things First by Stephen R. Covey in the early ’90s.  I think it can be helpful to anyone at any stage of life.

Big Rocks

One day, an expert in time management was speaking to a group of business students and, to drive home a point, used an illustration those students will never forget.  As he stood in front of the group of high-powered overachievers he said, "Okay, time for a quiz" and he pulled out a one-gallon, wide-mouth mason jar and set it on the table in front of him.

He also produced about a dozen fist-sized rocks and carefully placed them, one at a time, into the jar. When the jar was filled to the top and no more rocks would fit inside, he asked, "Is this jar full?"

Everyone in the class yelled, "Yes."  The time management expert replied, "Really?"  He reached under the table and pulled out a bucket of gravel. He dumped some gravel in and shook the jar causing pieces of gravel to work themselves down into the spaces between the big rocks. He then asked the group once more, "Is the jar full?"

By this time the class was on to him.  "Probably not," one of them answered. "Good!" he replied.  He reached under the table and brought out a bucket of sand.  He started dumping the sand in the jar and it went into all of the spaces left between the rocks and the gravel. Once more he asked the question, "Is this jars full?"

"No!" the class shouted.  Once again he said, "Good."  Then he grabbed a pitcher of water and began to pour it in until the jar was filled to the brim. Then he looked at the class and asked, "What is the point of this illustration?"

One eager beaver raised his hand and said, "The point is, no matter how full your schedule is, if you try really hard you can always fit some more things in it!"  "No," the speaker replied, "that's not the point.

The truth this illustration teaches us is:

If you don't put the big rocks in first, you'll never get them in at all."

What are the 'big rocks' in your life, time with your loved ones, your faith, your education, your dreams, a worthy cause, teaching or mentoring others?  Remember to put these BIG ROCKS in first or you'll never get them in at all.

So, tonight, or in the morning, when you are reflecting on this short story, ask yourself this question: What are the 'big rocks' in my life?

Then, put those in your jar first.

My three boys are all men now …time flies… much too fast, especially when we are not paying attention. Take the time to slow down, look and be mindful of the love surrounding you. There are no guarantees life will remain constant. I sincerely hope that my organizing articles have helped in some small way to build a stronger family connection.

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Guest Thursday, 22 June 2017

"Hi Eileen,

I Just ordered a copy of your book - looking forward to reading it.

I transferred from Touro law and graduated from Brooklyn Law last year. I'm working for a legal software firm right now and just took the bar exam.

I like the concept of your book and I'm sure I'll get some good things out of it. I have used some of the organization ideas that you taught me to achieve some great results. Honestly, the hours I spent working with you were in some ways more valuable than the thousands of hours I spent learning cases, statutes, and procedure in law school. I would have been totally overwhelmed without your help. I have always remembered the concept of "putting the big pieces in first" and have been applying that with much success in law school, work, and life. To study for the bar exam, which was this past week, I made flash cards in three different sizes, with the most important concepts on the "big cards" down to the fine points on the small cards. This was extremely useful, especially on an exam where you have to be really fast in your responses because time is working against you. I totally credit you with breaking that down for me - the analogy of the rocks in the jar was the best way I have ever heard that explained. Thank you for that and I hope that you are doing great. Glad to see you won a NAPO award and I'm looking forward to checking out your book.

All the best and God Bless,

- Don